Dave Grohl, Perry Farrell, and the Curious Case of the Parasocial Relationship
Rock stars are flawed individuals like all the rest of us
:: PRELUDE
Let’s talk about parasocial relationships in relation to a couple of things that happened in the world of music this week.
To start, Dave Grohl, everyone’s favorite “good guy” musician, announced via Instagram that he has fathered a child outside of his twenty-one-year marriage.
Then, Friday night, at a Jane’s Addiction gig in Boston, Perry Farrell attacked Dave Navarro onstage in what appeared to be a blind drunken rage.
As you might imagine, both of these things have fans on the internet buzzing.
For fans of Grohl, people seem to fall into one of two camps. There are those who viewed him as one of the good guys, a dedicated family man, a sort of anti-rock star rock star of sorts. Then, there were the more cynical nonplussed fans who took the news in stride with an almost “what did you expect” attitude.
As for Jane’s Addiction fans, there weren’t many who expressed surprise, likely given the fact that anyone who has followed the band over the years knows of Perry Farrell’s struggles with addiction, and according to attendees of many of their recent shows, Perry has been chugging from open bottles of wine onstage every night, missing cues, and giving sloppy, lackluster performances.
Parasocial relationships are defined as one-sided connections that people form with media personalities, celebrities, or public figures, where the individual feels a deep personal bond despite no reciprocal relationship existing. In the context of music fans and their favorite artists, these relationships can be particularly intense and emotionally charged.
It’s not uncommon for fans to feel like they know an artist on a personal, almost intimate, level and in the age of social media when fans have more access to their favorite musicians than ever before these connections often deepen significantly.
What damage does this do to both the artist and their admirers? Maybe that depends on a stan’s ability to separate the art from the artist. Is Dave Grohl an asshole for cheating on his wife, betraying her trust and that of his daughters? Absolutely. Is Perry Farrell an asshole for his unprovoked violent behavior toward Dave Navarro? One hundred percent.
Will this stop anyone from listening to their music? Unlikely.
These are simply our latest reminders that rock stars are just people — flawed individuals with problems like all the rest of us. While it’s somewhat understandable, it’s still quite unnatural to elevate other people on a pedestal the way we do with our favorite musicians. It’s doubtful this will ever change, but it’s good every now and then to be reminded of the fact that they put on their pants one leg at a time, the same as you and me.
What say you? Sound off in the comments. I’d love to hear what you think.
Ground control to reader: Take your protein pills. Put your helmet on.
This newsletter ain’t gonna read itself.
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:: WEEKLY MIXTAPE
Zappagram #125 featuring: Fontaines D.C., Atlanta Space Quartet, Illiterate Light, Briston Maroney, Joy Oladokun, Bird and Byron, Dayglow, High Vis, The War On Drugs, The Comet Is Coming [Spotify | Apple Music]
Zappagram Playlist (3+ years of featured music): [Spotify | Apple Music]
:: MUSIC NEWS
» Kendrick Lamar has surprise-released a new song on his Instagram page — just days after being announced as the headliner of the 2025 Super Bowl Halftime Show. ❖
» Jon Bon Jovi is credited with helping to save a woman’s life after persuading her not to jump from a bridge in Nashville on Tuesday. ❖
» Elvis Costello’s King of America, the 1986 album that found the singer-songwriter exploring American music genres, will be the focus of a massive reissue that collects unreleased demos, outtakes, a concert recording, and more from the era, plus decades-later collaborations with the album’s co-producer T-Bone Burnett. ❖
» The Cure have sent out a batch of cryptic postcards to fans this week seemingly teasing their long-awaited new album, Songs of a Lost World, as well as its November 1st, 2024 release date. The band, who have not released a new album since 2008’s 4:13 Dream, first began teasing their new album this week by swapping their social and website logos to be an all-black one; then, guitarist Reeves Gabrels shared a link directing fans to the group’s newly-redesigned website, urging them to sign up for The Cure’s new mailing list. ❖
» There are many burning questions about the Oasis reunion tour that have yet to be answered. We still don’t know if they’re going to release any new music, who will play bass, guitars, and drums alongside Liam and Noel Gallagher, if the tour is coming to North America and the rest of the world outside England and Ireland, and how long it will last before the whole thing inevitably implodes. One thing we do know for sure as of today is that Fontaines DC will not play any role in it due to a war of words that has erupted between the two camps. ❖
» Pearl Jam transformed Ted Nugent’s “Stranglehold” into an anti-gun anthem while briefly covering the 1975 single during their concert in Baltimore on Thursday (September 12th). As an outspoken gun rights advocate, Nugent was unsurprisingly displeased with Pearl Jam’s take on the song. In a tweet responding to the cover, he invited Vedder to “join me on my RAV spirit campfire to discuss how your insane liberal policies have created an explosion in engineered violent recidivism while you fight to disarm helpless innocent citizens.” ❖
» Justin Vernon‘s Bon Iver project is teasing its first new album in five years in a mysterious social media post, although no concrete information has yet been made available about the timing or content of the Jagjaguwar project. For now, fans are directed to pre-save the content through a link from the Bon Iver website. ❖
» Tom Petty: Heartbreakers Beach Party, the semi-lost 1983 directorial debut of future Oscar winner Cameron Crowe, aired only once at 2:00 AM on MTV. Now a fully-restored edition with 20 additional minutes of extra footage is coming to theaters for the first time for two nights, October 17th and October 20th. The 20th would have been Petty’s 74th birthday. ❖
» As Donald Trump prepares to return to Arizona for a campaign event on Thursday at the Linda Ronstadt Music Hall, the legendary singer herself criticized the former president for his “his toxic politics, his hatred of women, immigrants and people of color, his criminality, dishonesty, and ignorance.” ❖
» Earlier this week, Donald Trump called in to Fox News to complain about Taylor Swift endorsing Kamala Harris. He made clear in that conversation that he “was not a Taylor Swift fan,” and yet his campaign is now selling Make America Great Again shirts that replicate the exact merchandise design the musician has been using on the Eras Tour. I hope she sues the shit out of the son of a bitch. ❖
» First, there were those fake AI-generated “Swifties For Trump” memes that Donald Trump reposted, but denied having any hand in creating. Then, after Swift publicly endorsed Kamala Harris for president, Trump proclaimed that he’s “not a Taylor Swift fan” because “she’s a very liberal person.” (Brittany Mahomes is cool, though.) Then, Trump’s campaign ripped off Swift’s Eras Tour merch with a similar-looking “Trump Era” shirt. This morning he logged into his Truth Social social network and posted “I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT!” Let’s be clear, Trump and Vance are engaged in a campaign of stochastic terrorism. First, they aimed their dangerous rhetoric toward the innocent Haitian immigrants in Springfield, Ohio, and now this inflammatory language directed at Taylor Swift. They are going to get someone injured or killed. We have got to stop these bastards in November. ❖
:: B-SIDES
» Taylor Swift helped drive over 400,000 people to voter registration resources following her endorsement of Kamala Harris earlier this week. ❖
» Frankie Beverly, legendary Philadelphia soul and funk singer and leader of Maze, has died at the age of 77. ❖
» Wilco are closing out the year with a string of December 2024 tour dates. ❖
» Did Noel Gallagher already write a new Oasis album? ❖
» Pink Floyd are in talks with Sony Music to sell their back catalog for an estimated $500 million. ❖
» Elon Musk, who radiates charm in the same sense that charm radiates from a long-dead raccoon on the side of a ditch, has publicly offered to get Taylor Swift pregnant. ❖
» Morrissey has claimed his former The Smiths bandmate Johnny Marr blocked a planned greatest hits album. ❖
:: Z-REX
Rage Against the Machine gave an electric live performance at Woodstock 99, and because we are all currently raging against the machine, it felt especially appropriate to share this today.
:: NEW RELEASES
Chilly Gonzales: GONZO • Dale Crover (of Melvins): Glossolaliao • The Damned: AD 2022 – Live in Manchester • Floating Points: Cascade • Foxing: Foxing • London Grammar: The Greatest Love • M. Ward: For Beginners: The Best of M. Ward • Nada Surf: Moon Mirror • The Notorious B.I.G.: Ready To Die (30th Anniversary) • Snow Patrol: The Forest Is the Path
:: RELEASE RADAR
SEPT 20 - Bob Dylan & The Band: The 1974 Live Recordings • Bright Eyes: Five Dice, All Threes • Butthole Surfers: Locust Abortion Technician (Vinyl Reissue) • Fleetwood Mac: Mirage Tour ’82 (Live) • Galaxie 500: Uncollected Noise New York ’88-’90 • Gregg Allman Band: Uncle Sam’s • Hippo Campus: Flood • Jamie xx: In Waves • Jesse Malin: Silver Patron Saints • Joan as Police Woman: Lemons, Limes and Orchids • Julian Casblancas + The Voidz: Like All Before You• Phil Collins: Both Sides (All The Sides) Box Set • Sade: Love Deluxe (Vinyl Reissue) • Sarah Jarosz: Polaroid Lovers (Deluxe Edition) • Thurston Moore: Flow Critical Lucidity • Wilderado: Talker
SEPT 27 - AC/DC: Fly on the Wall (Vinyl Reissue) • Alan Sparhawk: White Roses, My God • Alice in Chains: Black Gives Way to Blue (Vinyl Reissue) • Billy Strings: Highway Prayers • The Fray: The Fray Is Back EP • Gavin DeGraw: Chariot 20 • Genesis: Invisible Touch (Vinyl Reissue) • Kate Bollinger: Songs From a Thousand Frames of Mind • Lou Reed: Why Don’t You Smile Now: Lou Reed at Pickwick Records 1964-65 • October Drift: Blame the Young • Tropical Fuck Storm: Tropical Fuck Storm’s Inflatable Graveyard
OCT 4 - Aphex Twin: Selected Ambient Works Volume II (Expanded Edition) • Better Than Ezra: Friction, Baby (Vinyl Reissue) • Coldplay: Moon Music • Don Henley: Building the Perfect Beast (40th Anniversary Edition) • Finneas: For Cryin’ Out Loud! • Hazlett: Goodbye to the Valley • Jason Isbell and The 400 Unit: Live From the Ryman Vol. 2 • Joni Mitchell: Joni Mitchell Archives, Vol. 4: The Asylum Years (1976-1980) • Leon Bridges: Leon • Neil Young: Freedom (Vinyl Reissue) • Suede: Dog Man Star (30th Anniversary Edition)
OCT 11 - Chat Pile: Cool World • Dawes: Oh Brother • The Linda Lindas: No Obligation • The Offspring: Supercharged
OCT 18 - Albert King and Stevie Ray Vaughan: In Session (Reissue) • Barenaked Ladies: Barenaked for the Holidays (Vinyl Reissue) • Fantastic Negrito: Son of a Broken Man • Japandroids: Fate & Alcohol • Jerry Cantrell (of Alice in Chains): I Want Blood • Joy Oladokun: Observations From a Crowded Room • MC5: Heavy Lifting • Phantogram: Memory of a Day • Tim Heidecker: Slipping Away • Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers: Long After Dark (Deluxe Edition)
OCT 25 - Amyl and the Sniffers: Cartoon Darkness • Bootsy Collins: Album of the Year # 1 Funkateer • Bryan Ferry: Retrospective: Selected Recordings 1973-2023 • Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young: Live at Fillmore East, 1969 (2024 Mix) • Green Day: American Idiot (20th Anniversary Deluxe Edition) • Laura Marling: Patterns in Repeat • Lone Justice: Viva Lone Justice • Pixies: The Night the Zombies Came • Soccer Mommy: Evergreen • Tears For Fears: Songs for a Nervous Planet (Live)
:: ON THIS DATE
SEPT 16 - Birthdays: B.B. King (1925) • Richard Marx (1963) • Former Clash drummer Topper Headon was released from jail after serving 10 months of a 15-month sentence on a narcotics charge. (1988)
SEPT 17 - Birthdays: Hank Williams (1923) • Baz Luhrmann (1962) • Keith Flint of The Prodigy (1969) • The Doors were banned from The Ed Sullivan Show after Jim Morrison broke his agreement with the show’s producers. Morrison said before the performance that he wouldn’t sing the words, “Girl, we couldn’t get much higher,” from “Light My Fire” but did anyway. The Doors also performed their new single “People Are Strange.” (1967)
SEPT 18 - Birthdays: Dee Dee Ramone (1952) • Jimi Hendrix was pronounced dead on arrival at St. Mary Abbot's Hospital in London at the age of 27. (1970) • Rob Tyner of MC5 died after he suffered a heart attack in the seat of his parked car in his hometown of Berkley, Michigan. (1991)
SEPT 19 - Birthdays: Brian Epstein (1934) • Bill Medley (1940) • Cass Elliott (1943) • Daniel Lanois (1951) • Nile Rogers (1952) • Jarvis Cocker (1963) • Singer/songwriter, 26-year-old Gram Parsons, died under mysterious conditions in Joshua Tree, California. (1973) • The No Nukes concert was held at New York's Madison Square Garden. (1979) • Ozzy Osbourne’s former drummer, Lee Kerslake, died aged 73 from prostate cancer. (2020)
SEPT 20 - Birthdays: Alannah Currie of The Thompson Twins (1959) • Keef Cowboy of Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five (1960) • Nuno Bettencourt (1966) • Ben Shepherd of Soundgarden (1968) • AC/DC released their third studio album Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap. (1976)
SEPT 21 - Birthdays: Leonard Cohen (1934) • Don Felder (1947) • Phil Taylor of Motorhead (1954) • Liam Gallagher (1972) • Meatloaf released Bat Out Of Hell. (1977) • American jazz bassist Jaco Pastorius died from injuries sustained in a fight when he tried to enter the Midnight Bottle Club in Wilton Manors, Florida (from which he'd been banned.) (1987)
SEPT 22 - Birthdays: David Coverdale (1951) • Nick Cave (1957) • Joan Jett (1958) • The first Farm Aid benefit concert was held before a crowd of 80,000 people at the Memorial Stadium in Champaign, Illinois. (1985) • A judge ruled that the original copyright to “Happy Birthday” was invalid and the song would now be in the public domain. The copyright was obtained by the Clayton F. Summy Co. from the song's writers, sisters Mildred and Patty Hill, and bought for $15 million in 1988 by Warner Chappell Music Inc. (2015)
:: CODA
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May all your albums play without skips. 🤘🏻
Ted Nugent & Elon "Leon" Musk are nothing short of batshit CRAZY! Musk is very creepy especially when comes to women!
His buddy Trump & Musk are both put off by women of intellect & strength! They are very transparent to strong women, they know they're full of shit!
More releases that are of interest are coming soon!
Phil Collins: Both Sides (All The Sides) Box Set
Sade: Love Deluxe (Vinyl Reissue)
Barenaked Ladies: Barenaked for the Holidays (Vinyl Reissue)
Fantastic Negrito: Son of a Broken Man
Joy Oladokun: Observations From a Crowded Room (Most looking forward to)